The Secretive Life
by CampionSayn
Summary: In which the Mini-cons reveal pieces of themselves. Five truths per. Armada.
1. Autobots

Disclaimer: I own nothing, even though a large portion of me may really want to.  
Warnings: Slight mention of bot/bot, maybe bot/human pairings.  
Summary: Five truths per Mini-con. Should be a lot of fun.

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Incinerator:

1.) A part of him finds Blurr to be a complete and utter snob, but another part of him finds it, in a word, refreshing. Most of the mechs he knows are too docile, like Red Alert, or too fool-hardy, like Hot Shot and Sideswipe. And besides, isn't it the snobs who get all the attention?

2.) During power-link, it's hard for the racer not to notice that he's basically attaching himself to Blurr's… aft.

3.) Rap music is horrible. Seriously, he can't listen to it for more than three seconds without getting physically ill.

4.) To him, High Wire is very, very attractive. His paint job is just the right shade of blue and the orange mask is just this side of adorable. If the BMX wasn't dating Rad, Incinerator would jump his wires in a blink.

5.) While his partner can barely tolerate Sideswipe, Incinerator can't help but feel that if he was just slightly taller and lost that tendency of hugging, he'd be perfect for Blurr. He could easily imagine them having a couple sparklings and a home together…. Insert manic laughter here.

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Nightbeat:

1.) He does not like his appearance. He can't help thinking of himself as ugly, simply because he does not have a proper faceplate.

2.) He's the youngest Mini-con on base, and it drives him insane. Nobody seems to get his jokes except Jolt and that's only because his mind seems to be in the gutter 50% of the day.

3.) Sideswipe is probably the best friend he's ever had. He stayed around even when they built a new Mini-con city on Cybertron, never once telling him what to do.

4.) His favorite color since coming to Earth has been beige. It was so weird to see a color like that and he couldn't remember seeing it on Cybertron so, first chance he got he asked Grindor's human to buy him the cheapest beige item he could find.

5.) His most prized possession sits on his berth every day and lies beside him every night. A little beige stuffed rabbit, with floppy chocolate ears.

=3---=3---=3---

Jolt:

1.) The first time he witnessed Halloween on Earth, his entire mainframe nearly shut down. Now he can't even look at a pumpkin without the urge to blow it up.

2.) He's a little obsessed with Greek mythology. Stories about Achilles and Icarus being his favorite. Thanks to them, he keeps his wings and joints in superb condition.

3.) Pranks on Long Arm are kind of his thing. It's so easy, too. The medic being so gullible, he never thinks anything the mini helicopter does is a trick, until it's too late.

4.) He made a good friend out of Runway when Starscream joined the Autobots. And Jolt couldn't help but feel a wave of nausea when he discovered that the jet was in love with Sonar.

5.) Jolt believes that Cyclonus gives helicopters a bad name. The mech can't even hold onto his rotors for more than three months!

=3---=3---=3---

Long Arm:

1.) The medic can ice skate. And he's exceptionally good at it, too.

2.) Mosquitoes give him the creeps, not only because they carry diseases, but the way that they feed on other organics makes him want to spray on ten tons of bug spray, even if he, himself cannot be harmed. He does, however, make sure the kids are safe. Five electric bug zappers are on the premises of the base.

3.) He's seen Red Alert without his optic band. Those were the prettiest optics he's ever seen.

4.) High grade Energon makes him sick. Swallowing a mouth full sends him straight to his partner and keeps him in stasis for a good day and a half.

5.) Sparkplug volunteered to decorate his room and Long Arm regrets it every single day. The yellow leader-con posted pictures of flowers and baby ducks everywhere and now the medic dreams of something floral and/or fowl related every time he recharges.

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Liftor:

1.) He can't help but feel apathetic towards Demolisher. If, for no other reason, than the fact that they both have oddly shaped optics.

2.) Smokescreen is probably the sweetest Autobot he's ever met. Not only does he call him partner, he also lets him sleep on his chassis whenever he wants.

3.) Something about break-dancing draws him in. The sheer movement and speed and free feeling of it is just invigorating! Nobody knows he can do it, but if they should find out… well, maybe it's a good thing he practices as often as possible.

4.) He was the only (unfortunate) mech around, the day that the female fleshling that "belonged" to Sureshock, started bleeding for no reason he could find, and he called in Red Alert, Long Arm, Optimus Prime and all the others, in a panic. He would later find that was the exact _opposite_ of what he should have done.

5.) The blue Mini-con once was trapped under Scavenger during one of his naps, and had to scream for over fifteen minutes before someone found him, half flattened.

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Commetor:

1.) He loathes Billy to his very core. Not really because of the kids' personality, but because Jetfire seemed to have taken a liking to him the day Thrust lured him into the ambush with those other Mini-cons.

2.) He does not like being called Mini-Blurr. True, they share similar physical features, but that's it!

3.) Human movies, in his humble opinion, totally rock! Sit him down with some high-grade and he'll watch anything, from '**Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights'** to '**Zoolander**', they're all awesome.

4.) Horses kinda scare the blue mech. They're always in herds, dangerous at both ends and he just _knows_ that if he ever got close enough to one, it would most likely lure him into a false sense of security before trampling him. Wouldn't be fatal, but would _hurt_.

5.) Commetor has begged Jetfire at least five times to let his partner get a different paint job. The jet always refuses for some reason, though.

=3---=3---=3---

Rollbar:

1.) Nobody except Scavenger knows that Rollbar was once on the Decepticon side. Only for about two hundred years, though.

2.) His favorite activity involves attempting to tackle Grindor and Nightbeat. It has thus far proven to be almost impossible when they're around other mechs, but alone they're easy targets. Nightbeat rewards him with a noogy, but Grindor always finds a way to turn the tables and pin the slightly bigger mech on his backside.

3.) He does not like snow. Not even a little.

4.) More than anything he wants to find a way to eat an orange. Their scent is intoxicating and if he was presented the opportunity, he'd stuff every inch of his room with the fruit.

5.) He caught Scavenger and Smokescreen going at it during one of their missions once. He kept his yap shut, but it was hard not to laugh at the time.

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Sparkplug:

1.) He's gay. Still trying to find a way to come out of the closet and finding it increasingly difficult. Perhaps he wouldn't, if he ever caught sight of, say, Grindor, High Wire, Jolt or Sonar in their spare time?

2.) He wore a black tuxedo once and loved every second of it. It fit perfectly and accentuated his aft very nicely.

3.) He believes that a tattoo could make him look tough. Not like the kind humans get, obviously, he doesn't have skin. But, permanent paint works just as well. A blue Chinese dragon on his right arm would be perfect.

4.) The first time he saw Optimus without his mask, the yellow mech cried out in joy. Their face plates were near identical and if Prime was ever turned into a Mini-con, they could be twins.

5.) He often feels that High Wire would be much better suited to be Optimus' partner. The BMX is both wise and strong. Nothing like Sparkplug, who was too naïve and not strong enough, in his own opinion. He doesn't know if High Wire ever took the offer, it would probably break Prime's and Rad's heart.

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High Wire:

1.) When he first awakened on the strange planet he'd known only by the name said by the person he saw a flicker of a long time ago, he was confused and scared. But then he saw Rad, and the fear left to give way to… he was pretty sure it was relief, but not positive.

2.) Grindor and Sureshock are his teammates, but that doesn't make them _mates_. He's still free to look for love and glad his human is willing to help him find it.

3.) The blue BMX was very startled the first time Rad gave him a bubble bath. It was just so weird. Transformers did bathe, but not like humans who added little soaps and colored salts and foam. It was like stepping into a dream.

4.) He enjoys it when the kids spirit the Min-cons away from the base for some fun. Most of the little bots never had the luxury on Cybertron, and it was wonderful to find kindness given for no reason by these young organic beings.

5.) Every night when his blond human friend falls into sleep, High Wire sneaks into bed with him and holds him tight, thinking how lucky he is to find a partner like this.

=3---=3--=3---

Grindor:

1.) His alt-mode is the very smallest in all of the Autobot base and it irks the hell out of him. But, then Carlos reminds him that skateboards are classy, and then he doesn't feel so bad.

2.) He can't help but feel guilty that he likes High Wire more than Sureshock, simply on the basis that the blue mech gets into just as much mischief as Grindor himself.

3.) The skateboard really likes staying over at Carlos' house. It's interesting if not hilarious to see how the Spaniard handles having parents, one baby brother and three older sisters. It's like a sit-com.

4.) Every so often when a new Mini-con is introduced to the humans, Grindor is a little on edge whenever the newbie looks for too long a time at his own partner. He always has the suspicion that they're going to try and court him, and the skateboard hates it.

5.) It took three hours after that fiasco with the camping trip for the grey Mini-con to come down from sheer panic. Two hours for him to work off the energy he'd produced because of it. And twenty-five minutes for Liftor, the strongest Mini-con on base, to pry Grindor from the bear hug he was imposing on his partner.

=3---=3---=3---

Sureshock:

1.) When the orange scooter had scanned Alexis, he got something his teammates hadn't. Common sense.

2.) In the time that Starscream spent among the Autobots, Sureshock had not entirely trusted him, but had ignored the feeling in favor of chatting with Swindle. The racecar was a crude, perverse bad-ass and the other liked it.

3.) The day that his partner had brought in the disk on human females and their birthing rituals for everyone on base to see, all the mechs stayed as far away from her as possible for the next few days, scared out of their circuits, even Scavenger. But, Sureshock was delighted at the end of the movie when the female it recorded had not one but _two_ "babies", and volunteered to watch it again with Alexis.

4.) It was humiliating that every single new Mini-con that came on base thought Sureshock was a femme at first glance. High Wire and Grindor were both slimmer than the orange mech, why didn't anyone get confused with them?!

5.) When he's sure and certain that nobody else is around, he sings "Don't Cry for Me, Argentina" and "Perfect Isn't Easy" in the wash racks. He's still not entirely sure why, though.

=3---=3---=3---

Okay, these are the Autobot Mini-cons for this round, so next round will focus on the Decepticon Minis. Suggestions are very much welcome, considering I'm running on empty for any ideas. Also, which Min-con belongs to Wheeljack? S.O.S., help, throw me a bone!


	2. Decepticons

Bits and Pieces  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, even though I may really want to.  
Summary: Five facts each about the Mini-cons and their opinions after their awakening.  
Warnings: Slight bot/human, bot/bot relationships mentioned. Slash and het. Don't like, don't read.

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Leader-1:

1.) Despite what everyone seems to think, it's his choice to be Megatron's Mini-con. He's seen the inside of the warlord's mind, and knows how scared he is sometimes.

2.) That fat human's offer to be friends did not fall on deaf audios. Perhaps he'll take him up on that offer if he lives long enough.

3.) The silver mech wasn't always silver. He used to be dark blue, once upon a time.

4.) Swindle pisses him off to no end. If he didn't know Starscream would crush him, Leader-1 would love to smash in the racer's face.

5.) The other Mini-cons rarely speak to him. Blackout tries, but Leader-1 gets so bored with him that he just walks away mid-sentence at times without even feeling guilty.

=3--=3---=3---

Crumplezone:

1.) To the drill, Cyclonus is insane, but fun. He hasn't threatened him yet, and the Mini-con has a feeling he won't have to for a while.

2.) That one time they chased those fleshies underground, Crumplezone loved looking about the caves and passages. It's what he was built for on Cybertron and on Earth it was so easy to get turned around in an adventure you'd never expect.

3.) He can't get drunk. He's tried six dozen times and it's impossible for his vision to blur, or a light buzz to befall his circuits.

4.) He recharges in Cyclonus' subspace pocket. It's dangerous at times, but it's so _warm_…

5.) The Autobot's Mini-medic Long Arm attracts him. He's just a little cutie that makes Crumplezone's spark flutter and flicker.

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Bonecrusher:

1.) At times, he can remember being worshipped in that desert landscape. For at least two-hundred years, ancient humans thought he was a god and asked him to grant the strangest wishes and he misses that.

2.) Demolisher would have been better as a master, in his opinion. Megatron was way too controlling.

3.) Blackout is the one and only mech he has ever had the semblance of a crush on. He'd never find out, of course, but the grey one tries as often as possible to make him feel appreciated.

4.) Sometimes he wishes he was a tank and not a crane. His arm always gets in the way and he breaks way too many things for his comfort.

5.) The color yellow looks good on him. It softens his darker outline and makes him feel happy, for reasons he can't entirely explain.

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Inferno:

1.) He's a suck up, and he doesn't even care. It helps him get to where he needs to go and that's fine by him.

2.) He is very aware that his face looks like that of an Earth bird, and woe is it to those who try to make fun of him for it. He'll deck people who make fun of his partner's head, let alone his own physicality.

3.) The green tactician's Mini-con is always sure to keep everyone far, far away from Thrust's room when he and Tidal Wave are engaged in…. how should he put it, um, _compromising positions_.

4.) He can be nice. If he wants to live, sometimes he has to play sweet and innocent. It's creepy and disgusting on so many levels and all the other Mini-cons automatically think he's drunk when he does play nice, but he _can_ do it.

5.) He has been bitten, shot, burned, stabbed and poisoned. Yet, he lives. Maybe Primus likes him?

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Ramjet:

1.) Yes, it is true that his partner is a phenomenal moron, but the jet still likes him. He's sort of like what the humans call a puppy, and Ramjet thinks that to be awesome.

2.) He _so_ wants a seagull for a pet. They're so cute! And they seem to really like basting mechs he doesn't like with their used excrement.

3.) That thing that female humans do in cages in certain buildings would be a perfect job for him! All he'd have to do is rock his hips to and fro, remove pieces of his armor and wait for other bots to hand him credits. As sweet would that be?

4.) This whole thing with the Decepticons on the Moon would be so worth the trouble if the little flyer could find buried treasure. He'd split it with the others…. Possibly.

5.) Star Wars was the worst thing he'd ever seen. And that's on top of millions of years of war back on Cybertron and the one year on Earth…. Well, maybe not the year on Earth. That was bad. Tidal Wave actually got hurt on this planet, so that says a lot.

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Blackout:

1.) He knows his alt mode is basically useless. But he makes up for it as well as he can. What he lacks in strength, he makes up in personality.

2.) He's only seen the Autobot Mini-con, Sureshock, from yards away, never spoken to him, but is a little in love with the scooter. He knows the orange mech managed to escape right out of Sideways' hand and he has a human for a Bulk. That's it. Oh, and Swindle likes him, too. Now he'll never get a shot at love at first sight…. Triple _sigh_.

3.) The tracker loves Demolisher like a brother or a best friend. He's sweet and has never hurt him, emotionally or otherwise. The perfect Bulk.

4.) He likes the human internet, but is very careful looking up anything about love. It either leads to pictures of humans and other creatures mating or goes with the philosophy angle. Both of which makes him sick.

5.) Privately, in the far reaches of his mind, he hopes the Autobots win the war. He's ashamed of it, but really, if they win, everyone wins. The Decepticons just don't know it yet.

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Swindle:

1.) His mind has never been tampered with, by any of the Decepticons. He's strong willed and hot-headed all on his own.

2.) At least five of the other Mini-cons on the Moon base have picked a fight with him and made advances towards him, at the same time! That's a real confidence booster.

3.) When he and Screamer were with the Autobots, the other Mini-cons ignored him, like he was carrying a Transformer type plague. All except one. That orange one with big arms and gentle voice, that belonged to the female squishy. He would always be grateful for that.

4.) He goes to Mirage whenever he's on base, for a race about the track the blue Mini-con had been found on. The other obliges, but sometimes regrets doing so. Swindle almost always wins and gets dust and debris all over him. And the red racer never bathes afterwards.

5.) He can sing any country song that's presented to him. He never does it when anyone else is around, though. Primus knows he'd never live down the humiliation. Mech like him should be singing rock and heavy-metal, not stuff listened to 75% of the time by _females_. Starscream would snatch his voice-box right out. At least, as far as he knows.


	3. Shield, Saber, Blaster, Spy

Summary: Alright, the previous chapters were for the "regular" Mini-cons, but this chapter is for the ultimate weapons gestalt and, even though I know he's not technically a Mini-con, Laserbeak, because the little cyberbirdy really needs some lovin'.  
Title: Saber, Shield, Blaster and Spy.  
Disclaimer: Ownership doesn't go to me. That would be Hasbro. Or, at least Hasbro and other affiliated parties.

=3---=3---=3---

Sonar:

1.) Back on Cybertron, he was a bit of a, how should he put it… whore. Yes, that was the most descriptive word on what he was. But he is not ashamed, at the time, he didn't even have his gestalt mates, so he was only looking out for his best interests.

2.) Runway first met him in an alley when he'd passed out in his own high-grade Energon. If the darker mech hadn't knocked some sense into him the next morning at his own place, the much younger jet would probably have died a long time ago.

3.) When he was with the Autobots, Billy showed him how to build birdcages. Sonar made and hid three of his own in the bowels of the ship, all sparkly and beautiful, and has never shown them to anyone. But, he has a feeling Billy knows.

4.) Yes, his antennae look like rabbit ears, but must everybody say this out loud?! To be ridiculed like that! … He hates those stupid vermin.

5.) Sonar believes he once saw what the humans call a vampire on a mission. The Decepticons were losing, the Star Saber had been flung into the forest nearby and low and behold, Sonar could have sworn he saw a human with thick canines sucking blood out of a deer. When the thing spotted the brightly colored mech, Sonar bolted out of there like Cyclonus on bath day to find his teammates and a very big stick.

=---=(--HIH--)=---=

Jetstorm:

1.) He believes that the popular author Shakespeare had a psychic connection to someone, possibly multiple someone's, in the Transformer war. 'Two households, both alike and dignity'? Come on! So describing this ten million years war!

2.) The oddest of the Air Defense Team is very proud of his individuality. He makes a note of it every day by saying to his reflection whenever he can, "You are strong. You are charming. You are one of a kind. You are not a loser at all."

3.) Admittedly, he has a bit of a fetish for fire. Not as much as say, Cyclonus with explosions or even Megatron with this stupid urge to take over the universe, but he admits it's unhealthy. So, trying to get help, he found some way, still not quite sure how he managed it, to set Thrust's room on fire. Now not only does everyone keep him away from matches, he has someone to talk to going to the Energon storage room.

4.) He loves both his partners dearly, but he has the weirdest urge to be around Leader-1 whenever the silver/grey mech is in a semi-good mood.

5.) Once, when Megatron was in full recharge, Jetstorm brought in a pool filled with bright green apple jell-o and dive-bombed off one of the tyrant's horns. It was totally awesome! Even if Demolisher _did_ catch him and wake the boss man up when Jetstorm was setting up for a second jump.

=3---=3---=3---

Runway:

1.) Loving Sonar is a bit of a chore sometimes, but Runway makes the most of it and does what he can to make them both happy.

2.) During one of the battles on Earth, when it was required for the three jets to star as individual units, Runway found a very sharp, sort of triangular rock and hid it in his subspace pocket. Later, back at the Moon base, he snuck into Thrust's room and put it where he was sure the tactician wouldn't be able to see it. Right before Runway fell into recharge himself, the beautiful sound of the squid-head's screams sent him into the best recharge ever.

3.) When he's particularly bored, he remembers Cybertron. Not much, just the good stuff, like Sonar when he was a dancer, himself working in a factory away from the battles, Jolt passing by his home on his way to work, Jetstorm being the freak he is and so on.

4.) Starscream is a good person, in the smaller jet's opinion. He has a conscience and Jetstorm hopes it stays around.

5.) Runway is the oldest in his gestalt and that can be taxing sometimes. His joints are often creaky and his circuits need to be changed out more often than not. But, then, Sonar lathes attention on him, and their nights together are like bathing in the best Energon known to Transformer kind. So really, it's not that bad.

=====0---X(0o0)X---0=====

Mirage:

1.) He knows Blurr didn't mean anything the first time they met, what with the whole gunfire thing and collapsing stadiums, but… He still can't help disliking him severely. Hot Shot he likes. Very nice paint job, sweet disposition and willing to risk his aft for Mini-con kind. Mirage likes very much.

2.) He's made a bet with Swindle about when Sparkplug will come out of the closet. Mirage likes to think it will happen in the next few months, Swindle is leaning more towards when they get back to Cybertron.

3.) He has swallowed the drink coffee by accident. He will not be doing that ever again, it was worse than the maximum level of high-grade he's ever consumed and at least that didn't leave him with a really gross taste in his system and the feeling he'd fall apart any second.

4.) Liftor is oddly nice to him, but the racer believes that's only because he once fell asleep on top of Mirage when he was in recharge. Waking up that morning to Smokescreen's laughter was the worst and he almost beat Liftor within an inch of his life.

5.) Rainbows make him happy. They never appeared in Cybertron's sky and it was always wonderful to see the little ribbons of color form after the rain.

=3--=3--=3--

Dirt Boss:

1.) If ever he gets his servos on really fresh high-grade, he shares it with whoever he can find on the condition that they sing Irish drinking songs with him. So far he can quote only "The Bastard Deserves to Die" and "Kiss My Irish Ass", but he's getting better.

2.) Human blood scares him. True, he's only seen it once, when Rad had a nosebleed on base, but it made him feel anxious and lightheaded. Later he would realize that it was because the red liquid smelled and tasted like Earth metals, according to the kids and literature.

3.) When he recharges, his worst nightmares are those that in which he is drowning. He wakes up with the sensations he's trapped and Downshift has to hold him for a few minutes so he knows that he's woken up and not dying.

4.) Inside the Moon base, when he and his gestalt were not in use, they were stuck inside that storage room along with the other Decepticon Mini-cons. It was quite cramped, but it gave Dirt Boss the opportunity to learn more about their darker counterparts. They weren't all bad, just found themselves in a situation they couldn't get out of.

5.) Before leaving Earth, he and his gestalt planted some sapling trees about the base. Dirt Boss hopes that when they should visit in the future, they'll be taller than the Mini-cons. He had a feeling they would be, he liked to think of them as the Mini-cons individual growth.

=3---=3---=3---

Downshift:

1.) He often wishes he was born with wings, it would at least give him a reason to daydream about the skies all the time.

2.) He can't understand the concept of the Earth Holiday St. Patrick's Day. Was it a celebration of the four-leafed clover or the color green? And why must those wearing green inflict physical violence on those without the color on this day?

3.) Downshift likes hats. In fact most of his room has little hooks to hold the dozen and a half that he owns. Bowler hats are the ones that make him look the most fetching, but should he run out of those, cowboy hats look good on him as well.

4.) Grindor has taken it upon himself to thrust the lighter painted mech into chaos when he gets bored. It doesn't happen very often, but when it does, Downshift often hopes one of the Bulks will flatten him so he doesn't have to face his peers.

5.) The song "Banana Phone" drives him insane. When it comes on the radio, he smashes the poor electronic device with whatever's on hand. It has been killed and brought back to life exactly eight times by Jolt and the flyer is starting to get mad at the racer.

====---0o0---====

Skyblast:

1.) Rad showed him a game show once that helped humans find a mate and the shy Mini-con now believes that is the perfect way for him to find a sparkmate. It's so simple! Stand behind a curtain, have a friend choose three femmes, put them on the other side of the curtain, ask them questions, take one home! Score one for the fleshlings.

2.) That barn the humans took them to scared him a lot. It was a nice place to hide for those whole, what, four hours, but really, all the smaller organics crawling around that place made him want to run away screaming.

3.) He's not afraid of everything. Just the Decepticons, a couple Autobots, giant organics, little skittering organics, slime, dark places, guns that are not him, certain Mini-cons and, well…. Sureshock's human, but only during seven days of the month. But, he doesn't have to feel bad about that, _everyone_ is afraid of her during that time.

4.) Skyblast often feels guilty that he's a little in love with Rad when he knows for a fact that he's High Wire's and also knows that the BMX will not hesitate to kick his aft, should he do something stupid like hug or grope the human.

5.) The leader-con does not understand the sports catalogues the boys keep bringing into the base. The women in them aren't doing any sports, they're just standing in thin strips of cloth while their male companions actually do the sports or hug them. What is their purpose?

=3---=3---=3---

Astroscope:

1.) The blue member of the Requiem Mini-cons thinks this war between Autobots and Decepticons is really, really stupid. He fully believes it could all end if the two leaders would just climb on top of each other and get it all over with.

2.) Turtles, to Astroscope, are this world's most awesome creatures. Both the land dwellers and those beautiful ones that swim at high velocity in water currents. He kinda wants to be a turtle… yeah.

3.) Despite his faceplate giving him the image of being a complete nerd, he is in fact, not. If his way of living were to be given a label, it would most likely be jock. He can play any sport the kids present him and the other Mini-cons with and he usually wins.

4.) The constellations surrounding Earth are a wondrous sight to him. Back on Cybertron, the pollution blotted out the prettiest formations, which gave him few to look at other than the Iacon Shift and Decepticon Emblem. Here on Earth a variety of images in the solar system appear before him. His favorites being Ursa Major, Canis Minor and Aries.

5.) Finding a sparkmate is not a priority for him. He just doesn't have the drive or desire for it. In fact, he could go through the rest of his life just interfacing with whoever was willing.

=3---=3---=3---

Payload:

1.) To the dark Mini-con, butterflies are one of the best things he's ever seen. They live such a short life, but they bring such beauty with them, and he envies that.

2.) He wasn't aware of it until it was too late, but while with the Autobots, he discovered and helped take care of a small field of what Fred described as Marijuana. They were so pretty, he felt it was a shame when all the fleshlings on base forbade his ever stepping foot near the stuff again.

3.) Payload has tried on many occasions to lay a kiss on Astroscope, but always backs out at the last second. Somehow, he just knows his gestalt partner will just think it's an invitation to a night of interfacing.

4.) He would have liked to stay with Smokescreen. The hardy giant was pleasant to be around and seemed to really make an attempt at understanding all the Mini-cons. Hence, why Payload cried the night Megatron brought them to the Moon and all the Requiem Mini-cons discovered they'd been forced to blow a hole through the orange Autobot.

5.) Band-Aids to him, are some great pieces of decoration. They stick to flesh and metal for hours on end and he's discovered they're also good for injuries!

==---0o0---==

Laserbeak:

1.) It's not that he fears his giant friends, it's more like he envies them. Even the Mini-cons and humans are bigger than him and he barely tolerates the jokes. Being small is not a crime, but still, it would be nice to at least be a little bigger.

2.) He knows about the bird cages Sonar and Billy make and has thus succeeded in breaking three of them and cleverly disposing of the remains. They weren't that pretty anyway, and that's a few less barred nests the birdie would have to test out.

3.) Four pigeons once chased him from their roost and kicked his aft. Big suckers with those feathers attached to their necks that looked like fluffy ping-pong balls and were fat as a football. But, no worries, after Sureshock found him covered in excrement and dented to the Pit, the orange scooter gave him a pure Energon bath with bubbles. A week later the pigeons mysteriously disappeared, too.

4.) His favorite Autobot would have to be Red Alert. Not because the big guy created him, but because he's calm, level-headed and has the ability to make everyone shut up with just one look. Laserbeak would love to do that.

5.) The spy wishes to forever remain on Earth. He's sure Cybertron would be great once he got used to it, but Earth was the place he had grown most fond of, despite all the things that could eat and swallow him the first try. He's actually gotten higher self-image since adapting to everything on this strange and beautiful planet, so after the war he is going to stay in the Earth base. That's his final decision.


End file.
